If I wasn’t so @#$%^& sick I’d hit something!
As it is I couldn’t hit my face with a ping pong paddle.
I finally got to see a health practitioner, after many
agonizing days of trying to get in.
They did the usual flu test, inserting what looked like
a rather large (several feet long) thick cable, which I
firmly believe was once used to hold a bridge in suspension,
up my nose, to get a sample that they could test.
She said it “might” tickle.
It certainly did, when it popped out of my backside I just
laughed and laughed.
The test came back negative for the flu, which normally
would have buoyed my spirits, but instead of sending a
smiling jovial nurse to bring me the news, they slid the results
under the door, and when I went to leave I noticed they
were all wearing Hazmat suits and carrying flame throwers.
I took the hint and shuffled back to the car, somewhat
happy that I didn’t have the dreaded flu.
I’m not sure if I should be concerned but my head fell off
on the ride home.
I’ll be back soon, I hope…